Monday, April 23, 2012

~page 191~



Being a parent can be really hard sometimes.
We teach and guide and pray that when our children are away from the home that they make good choices.
But we never know what choices they'll be confronted with or what they'll be exposed to once they step out that front door.
That is what scares me most.





Our oldest came home from school one day last week and started telling me about a book that a female classmate was reading.
This book was on the shelf in their classroom, available for anyone to read.  As much as we encourage literacy in our own home, there are some books that are just meant for adult eyes only.
You would never find such a book offered in a school book order or even in the Young Adult section of the library.

I own a copy of the book.  (This particular author is great, but geared toward an adult audience.) 
I ran and got the book and turned to "page 191" and read the four very *descriptive* pages, just like he had at school. 

It was the longest four pages I've ever read in my life.
His wheels were turning. 
Then the questions started.
And kept pouring in...
and going on...
and on.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind him asking.
I WANT him to come to us with questions.
I WANT to be the one to tell him the answers.
The correct answers.
Not the "school bus version". 
What gets me was that we even had to have the conversation in the first place.
I was ready to talk, but wasn't ready for him to hear what I had to say.  We've talked before about the same things, but not to this extent.



The conversation went as well as it could have.
I stressed some important things and kept some items for a later discussion or for him to discover on his own.



Sometimes I wish I could keep them young and innocent forever.
To be able to hold their hands and give them security.


But then I remind myself that we are giving them the proper tools to make their own decisions in life.
We have to slowly let go more and more each day, trust them, and watch them grow before our eyes.
It's awesome and scary at the time.

More than anything, I'm glad we've taught them to feel comfortable enough to come to us with any questions.
 That door will always be open.

8 comments:

Kim Corrigan-Oliver said...

I can feel your struggle. Reece is still so young, but I do think about this all the time. In a way it is good, I keeps me focused on building a relationship that will foster communication and trust as he grows up but on the other hand it freaks me out.

You are so right "being a parent is hard."

P.S. Sounds to me like you handled everything very well :)

Melissa said...

Oh dear...been there, done that. Our conversations have been all over the place. Some of them were easier than others and as much as I hate to say this, you have a lot more to come and it won't be easy. Some of them could possibly break your heart, but as long as that door is open and they come to you, you'll be fine and get through it. Know you are not alone.

Amber said...

Aaron and I were just talking about this occurring in the future. Ours are still such babies in so many ways. I wish I could give you a hug. I admire your parenting in that your son felt comfortable coming and talking with you. And you're right, as much as we want to, we can't 'protect' them forever. Beautiful pictures and beautiful words.

Lisa Coffee said...

Oh Mama. My heart goes out to you. It will be a while still before we're at this juncture, but it's coming, I know. I love this post and how you handled it. And the opening, maturing tulip images were a brilliant touch.

Lisa Coffee said...

Oh Mama. My heart goes out to you. It will be a while still before we're at this juncture, but it's coming, I know. I love this post and how you handled it. And the opening, maturing tulip images were a brilliant touch.

Heather aka Proud Mama said...

Oye. I hate how grown up our world things our children need to be. So glad he came to you for answers and clarification. That is truly so important. Hugs, mama.

cpcable said...

What a wonderful mama you are. These things are inevitable, but that doesn't make them easy. My baby is still so very young that it's hard to imagine dealing with such things, but I know it will come sooner than I think.

Pigeon's Mom said...

ABSOLUTELY AWESOME that he felt totally okay with approaching you with the info and the questions. you are definitely doing something right!

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